this is totally cool. shoulda saved this for a weekly (assignment) post. but, alas... i already wrote mine for the week. pfft
http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/aneesh_chopra_americas_chief_technology_officer.php
Monday, April 20, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
designing my site
so, i'm building a website using iweb. it's kinda fun given i don't have to code a single piece of html if i don't want to. (the geek in me most likely will end up coding... but the thrill is in not HAVING to... psh). anyways, iweb makes it very easy for you to pull together a website and incorporate plenty of dynamic elements to give your site that 2.0 feel.
i mentioned in a previous post that i will be incorporating google maps into my site. i'm on the fence of whether or not i will add a blog solely dedicated to the site or not. there will definitely be a photo album with slide show capabilities. and, of course, a live count down. if i so choose, i can throw you tube clips on the site as well. but, i'm not so sure i want to incorporate videos just yet. maybe we can make a little movie about us instead of writing it out. that might work! (and i just came up with it as i write this post... brilliant!)
all of these elements are so easily integrated through the use of widgetry (my very own coined phrase... don't hate). each element is basically a "drag-n-drop" element packaged with all of the functionality inside. so, if i want to plop a google map on your web page, you drag the map widget onto your workspace. the widget attributes can be edited with your specific information. so, if i want the map to highlight a location, i simply type in the address and the widget displays the point of interest on the map.
now, i'm on a hunt for other widgets that i can drop into my pages. i'm wondering what rss feeds might be of interest to include on the page. maybe i can find a feed of events and entertainment for out of town guests to get the skinny on happenings. does anyone else no where i can grab some widgets of interest?
i mentioned in a previous post that i will be incorporating google maps into my site. i'm on the fence of whether or not i will add a blog solely dedicated to the site or not. there will definitely be a photo album with slide show capabilities. and, of course, a live count down. if i so choose, i can throw you tube clips on the site as well. but, i'm not so sure i want to incorporate videos just yet. maybe we can make a little movie about us instead of writing it out. that might work! (and i just came up with it as i write this post... brilliant!)
all of these elements are so easily integrated through the use of widgetry (my very own coined phrase... don't hate). each element is basically a "drag-n-drop" element packaged with all of the functionality inside. so, if i want to plop a google map on your web page, you drag the map widget onto your workspace. the widget attributes can be edited with your specific information. so, if i want the map to highlight a location, i simply type in the address and the widget displays the point of interest on the map.
now, i'm on a hunt for other widgets that i can drop into my pages. i'm wondering what rss feeds might be of interest to include on the page. maybe i can find a feed of events and entertainment for out of town guests to get the skinny on happenings. does anyone else no where i can grab some widgets of interest?
Saturday, March 21, 2009
seriously??
i mean... for real... 2.0 in my tour of a hotel???
so, as we plan our wedding, we are touring venues, chatting about menus and talking linens. then, the sales woman says, "oh, and included in your package is a free website! we also host an online community of brides sharing experiences and planning tips." is there an industry that isn't subscribing to 2.0 fever? if there is, they need to get a clue! i just didn't expect to have to hear any 2.0 lingo on a non-monday evening is all.
first off... it's a sign of the times when event venues throw in, not only, the cake or the complimentary toast, but a website as well. sheesh.
second of all (and the point of the matter)... this particular venue is using the online communication of already hitched brides in hopes to capitalize on the collaboration and sharing that's taking place. talk about your groundswell! the sales woman made sure to stress the fact that these blog and forum participants are not paid to endorse the venue and she encouraged me to visit the online community for honest feedback of the hotel's services as well as the service and offerings of its competitors. oh she was good! she knew just how to tap into the sucker i am. (sidebar: sales folks can see me coming from a mile away. they could sell me one sock without many sales tricks).
on this site, you can find rantings and ravings from experienced (read: already married) brides about products, vendors, and ceremony do's and don'ts. you can find a few obscure questions in the community as well. this is one of my favorites. lol
anyone else out there have any planning experience or come across any other "wedding 2.0" technologies? i'm building our wedding website and will probably incorporate a blog and a mashup with the venue and google maps. it's been fun thus far. once the site is done, i'll share.
anyone else out there have any planning experience or come across any other "wedding 2.0" technologies? i'm building our wedding website and will probably incorporate a blog and a mashup with the venue and google maps. it's been fun thus far. once the site is done, i'll share.
Friday, February 20, 2009
facebook & CNN... bedfellows yet again
much like what facebook & CNN did on inauguration day, they're up to it again. the president will be addressing congress regarding his first piece of legislation live on CNN & facebook. i'm guessing we can expect to watch the live stream courtesy of CNN in one frame while we watch our friends and other facebook users update there statuses and comment on the address (much to debo's enjoyment, i'm sure).
i think it's interesting that the obama camp is using the web and social networking to promote transparency in the administration. well, maybe interesting is a watered-down descriptive term. i think it's pretty cool and refreshing to have more of a connection with government through the mediums most convenient and intriguing to me. i mean... i watch CNN on tv. but, i blame the MBA program on that. if there wasn't the need to stay abreast of current events in order to remain a worthwhile contributor in classes, i probably would not watch it as often as i do. it's either that or i'm just getting plain old! as 30 stares me in the face, i'm latching onto the former and i ain't lettin' go. hmph.
i digressed a bit. as i was saying... my communication mediums of choice are all things 2.0. you have better luck getting in touch with me via text, email, IM, or writing on my wall. all those things will get through to me far sooner than a voicemail. just ask my grandparents. they caught on after a while as well. so, washington has received the memo too it seems. i also think it's smart that the administration is keeping up the momentum of the young voter population garnered during the campaign. i think it makes the whole political process (at least seem) genuine and it makes all the hype that motivated an entire generation to come out and vote in record numbers more than hype.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
abc.com
i visit abc.go.com all the time (admittedly not since the start of spring semester, however) to catch up on a few of my preferred (dare i call them favorite) shows. "grey's..." (of course), "private practice", and "brothers & sisters" are my main attractions to the site. usually, i visit to view the full episode player which is really awesome. not novel by any of today's web standards. but, cool nonetheless. i think abc was actually one of the first networks to offer web viewing of full episodes. don't quote me on it but i think it was. maybe i should look into it?
at any rate, i figure web viewing is quite 2.0-y. why not right? so, i went to abc.go.com to explore beyond my normally tunnel-vision-driven route (i.e. straight to the full ep section). i discovered that the network has an online community for the shows that air on the network! i got waaay to excited about it, i must admit. if you head to the homepage and click on the community link, a drop-down menu will appear and there you will find all the worlds 2.0 oysters. well, at least a couple.
there are blogs maintained by the writers of the shows. the blogs detail the writers' experiences coming up with the episodes as well as interviews with cast members of the abc shows. there are also hints of upcoming episode happenings. message boards are populated with viewer commentary on varying shows. you need to become a member of the abc online community to post a comment. widgets & games are fun pieces of the community. you can actually grab widgets for a particular show to put on your blog, facebook, igoogle, or myspace pages. the widgets include a count down clock to the next episode of the show, photos from episodes, and you can even have a mobile version of the widget sent via text to your cell phone. i posted the widget in a separate post by posting it straight from the abc website. check it out.
Monday, February 09, 2009
go 'head, b
after all that nonsense ms james was talkin' 'bout b...
she was still respectful.
"at last" by etta james is quite possibly my favorite song of all time. so, needless to say that i was more than excited to hear b's rendition on the cadillac records soundtrack. and she damn near nailed it! i mean it was so close to being as amazing as etta's. and i'm even more of a fan of b's for being the bigger person and remaining respectful.
she was still respectful.
"at last" by etta james is quite possibly my favorite song of all time. so, needless to say that i was more than excited to hear b's rendition on the cadillac records soundtrack. and she damn near nailed it! i mean it was so close to being as amazing as etta's. and i'm even more of a fan of b's for being the bigger person and remaining respectful.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
picasso, picasa...
anyone use picasa? or is all the world a flikr??
i've to admit that i've never used flikr to upload my photos. i've received a few invite to view albums but i've never actually been a subscriber. i choose picasa as my web album of choice. with much of the same core features as flikr, it gets the job done.
mostly, i use the site to put up pics for my family members to see. once, when a group of friends and i took a cruise together, we were all able to upload our pics to picasa and share with one another different perspectives of the trip. it was kinda cool to see the attractions and events that i'd missed while i experienced different adventures.
picasa is the web photo sharing environment for web 2.0 power house, google. so naturally, picasa albums have all the latest wiz-bang about it. you can link albums to corresponding greographic locations on a map, play back video, and (obviously) share photos with friends. you can even receive notification when your "favorite" friends make updates or post new photos to their albums. users can search public albums to see what random folks are up to and the staple 2.0 attributes, like tagging, are also features of the picasa albums.
another thing i find to be cool about picasa is that it will find all of the pictures on your computer and organize them for you. further, if you're using iPhoto (the mac photo application), there is a seamless interface between your iPhoto library and your picasa account (much like a lot of google applications). there seems to be quite the love affair between apple and google. do any of my fellow mac users concur?
any who... i thought i'd embed one of my albums here. we're currently renovating our basement. actually, finishing it. we're sharing the job with a few contractors that put up our drywall. from here out, however... it's all sweat equity. i enjoy watching it unfold step by step. what i don't enjoy is the muscle aches and pains after manual labor.
enjoy!
i've to admit that i've never used flikr to upload my photos. i've received a few invite to view albums but i've never actually been a subscriber. i choose picasa as my web album of choice. with much of the same core features as flikr, it gets the job done.
mostly, i use the site to put up pics for my family members to see. once, when a group of friends and i took a cruise together, we were all able to upload our pics to picasa and share with one another different perspectives of the trip. it was kinda cool to see the attractions and events that i'd missed while i experienced different adventures.
picasa is the web photo sharing environment for web 2.0 power house, google. so naturally, picasa albums have all the latest wiz-bang about it. you can link albums to corresponding greographic locations on a map, play back video, and (obviously) share photos with friends. you can even receive notification when your "favorite" friends make updates or post new photos to their albums. users can search public albums to see what random folks are up to and the staple 2.0 attributes, like tagging, are also features of the picasa albums.
another thing i find to be cool about picasa is that it will find all of the pictures on your computer and organize them for you. further, if you're using iPhoto (the mac photo application), there is a seamless interface between your iPhoto library and your picasa account (much like a lot of google applications). there seems to be quite the love affair between apple and google. do any of my fellow mac users concur?
any who... i thought i'd embed one of my albums here. we're currently renovating our basement. actually, finishing it. we're sharing the job with a few contractors that put up our drywall. from here out, however... it's all sweat equity. i enjoy watching it unfold step by step. what i don't enjoy is the muscle aches and pains after manual labor.
enjoy!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
inauguration day, CNN, & Facebook
amidst all of the hoopla of this past tuesday's events, there was much to discuss, watch, see, take pics of, and just marvel in. unfortunately for me, however, i was stuck at my desk watching the inauguration festivities streaming over the web courtesy of hulu.com. surprisingly, the stream was awesome. it was like watching tv! long gone are the days of internet via phone lines. remember when you could here the dialing and connecting? or even worse... the waiting. these days, technology, and the web in particular, is so responsive and provides so much to its audience. for a split second, i was lamenting about how i was going to miss the inauguration and that i'd have to set my dvr. what was i thinking?!??! with google being one of my best inanimate friends, my momentary lapse in judgement quickly turned resourceful as i "google"d (yes, it's a verb these days) "streaming inauguration." BAM! therein lied my solution. whew! crisis averted.
so, after tuning into hulu for about two hours, i (figuratively) turned to the CNN stream of the festivities. CNN had the coolest sync with facebook! the window was split into two frames: the left being the streaming screen and the right frame of facebook status updates. users were able to view their friends updated status or all facebook user updates... real time! it was awesome to watch as folks updated their status. updates were posted in less than one second intervals. facebook reported its highest usage during the inauguration and status updates surpassed the one million mark. the collaboration made plenty of headlines peaked the interest of a lot of journalists... obviously.
yet another example of the internet platform bringing folks closer to events and other folks. in this particular case, the event just happened to be one of the most memorable, historic events of our lifetime.
toodles.
so, after tuning into hulu for about two hours, i (figuratively) turned to the CNN stream of the festivities. CNN had the coolest sync with facebook! the window was split into two frames: the left being the streaming screen and the right frame of facebook status updates. users were able to view their friends updated status or all facebook user updates... real time! it was awesome to watch as folks updated their status. updates were posted in less than one second intervals. facebook reported its highest usage during the inauguration and status updates surpassed the one million mark. the collaboration made plenty of headlines peaked the interest of a lot of journalists... obviously.
yet another example of the internet platform bringing folks closer to events and other folks. in this particular case, the event just happened to be one of the most memorable, historic events of our lifetime.
toodles.
Monday, January 19, 2009
change of pace...
okay so... even though there are tons of wonderful things to write about here recently, i have to switch gears for a few weeks. i'm taking a special topics course on web 2.0 technology. i don't know much about the topic... hence my enrollment. so, in the weeks to come, (as part of a recurring assignment) i'll be talking about different emerging web technologies as i learn and gain exposure to said technologies. i'll also be asking for your opinion, feedback, and wisdom on the subject matter.
right... so... one of my first assignments is to create an alter in second life. racking (sp?) my brain on a name. stay tuned and i'll keep you posted on what i come up with.
(fast-forward a few days)
i created my avatar. i thought about whether or not i should go total beyonce and create an uber alter ego. but, alas, i decided to forgo anything that is dramatically different and i'll keep her rating in likeness to mine (G-PG). after all, this is for an assignment shared with academic peers. i named her (yes... i elected to remain the same gender) after my sister and the program provides the last names available for selection. so, cheyenne overland was born. i made
if no one has ever experienced the second life environment, you should check it out. it's mind boggling (to me) that folks have developed this environment to this extent! the options available to even create my alter being are endless. not to mention the gestures and all the movements that come along with the personality. it's going to take a while for em to get the moves down. in that arena, i feel as if i'm at a complete handicap. but, if i can get used to texting on the iPhone, i guess i can concur anything. well... so to speak.
right... so... one of my first assignments is to create an alter in second life. racking (sp?) my brain on a name. stay tuned and i'll keep you posted on what i come up with.
(fast-forward a few days)
i created my avatar. i thought about whether or not i should go total beyonce and create an uber alter ego. but, alas, i decided to forgo anything that is dramatically different and i'll keep her rating in likeness to mine (G-PG). after all, this is for an assignment shared with academic peers. i named her (yes... i elected to remain the same gender) after my sister and the program provides the last names available for selection. so, cheyenne overland was born. i made
if no one has ever experienced the second life environment, you should check it out. it's mind boggling (to me) that folks have developed this environment to this extent! the options available to even create my alter being are endless. not to mention the gestures and all the movements that come along with the personality. it's going to take a while for em to get the moves down. in that arena, i feel as if i'm at a complete handicap. but, if i can get used to texting on the iPhone, i guess i can concur anything. well... so to speak.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
i finally figured it out!
so i know... i'm slow at times... but i finally got it this morning.
i've been a democrat as long as i've had an opinion about politics and the way our country should be governed. i've voted democratic in just about every mayoral, gubernatorial, congressional, & presidential election since i was 18 (of course after extensive edification on all of the candidates). and never have i been so passionate, awe-inspired, and defensive about a candidate. i mean, down right ready to fight if anyone says anything negative about obama. and i especially go off the handle when the ignorant ass folks that i'm surrounded with everyday make unfounded negative comments. i like to tell myself that i'm not an obama fan because he's (categorically) black like me. but this morning, i realized... it sure the hell is the reason. lol. i mean, i agree with a majority of, if not, his entire platform and stance on the proverbial issues. but, dagnamit... he's a brotha! i mean, come on! THAT's why i get so worked up about this entire season. trust me, i was a clinton fan (before i could vote) and kerry was so-so. i was a gore supporter as well but i was never ready to go to blows for any of them! sheesh.
you know that anger in the pit of your stomach you get when you find out somebody's been messing with your younger sibling or somebody done said suttin' 'bout yo mama?!?! it's that kinda feeling and i finally realized, today, that it's because he feels like more than a candidate... he feels like family. he's managed to embody everything that i've been wishing politicians would say for years. he's not this over-privileged white kid that grew up to "be" in politics saying what he has to say to stay in the ol' boy's network... i REALLY believe what he says because our stories are so similar. i know i sound corny but politics have never felt so personal as they do these days... i've never felt such a close proximity to the white house as i do (vicariously) through him. it's amazing.
i've been a democrat as long as i've had an opinion about politics and the way our country should be governed. i've voted democratic in just about every mayoral, gubernatorial, congressional, & presidential election since i was 18 (of course after extensive edification on all of the candidates). and never have i been so passionate, awe-inspired, and defensive about a candidate. i mean, down right ready to fight if anyone says anything negative about obama. and i especially go off the handle when the ignorant ass folks that i'm surrounded with everyday make unfounded negative comments. i like to tell myself that i'm not an obama fan because he's (categorically) black like me. but this morning, i realized... it sure the hell is the reason. lol. i mean, i agree with a majority of, if not, his entire platform and stance on the proverbial issues. but, dagnamit... he's a brotha! i mean, come on! THAT's why i get so worked up about this entire season. trust me, i was a clinton fan (before i could vote) and kerry was so-so. i was a gore supporter as well but i was never ready to go to blows for any of them! sheesh.
you know that anger in the pit of your stomach you get when you find out somebody's been messing with your younger sibling or somebody done said suttin' 'bout yo mama?!?! it's that kinda feeling and i finally realized, today, that it's because he feels like more than a candidate... he feels like family. he's managed to embody everything that i've been wishing politicians would say for years. he's not this over-privileged white kid that grew up to "be" in politics saying what he has to say to stay in the ol' boy's network... i REALLY believe what he says because our stories are so similar. i know i sound corny but politics have never felt so personal as they do these days... i've never felt such a close proximity to the white house as i do (vicariously) through him. it's amazing.
Monday, September 22, 2008
could this be true?
"so for some of you that have been praying that the conditions on your job can get better, you may be praying against the purpose of god in your life... because god may be using the adversity on your job to create an atmosphere for you to create his purpose and destiny... because god's strength is made perfect in weakness. many times, god will put you in a situation of uncomfortableness because god is not as concerned by your comfort as he is about his purpose and sometimes god has to make you uncomfortable now, so that he can ultimately bless you later. and if you were too comfortable in the position that you are in now, you would stay there too long and miss wherever god is getting ready to take you next. so he had to stir up the 'next' and trouble the water and create an atmosphere so that his purpose can be [fulfilled]."
-T.D. Jakes
imma let my "gift make room" for me. two snaps! i ain't gonna "pray away my opportunity."
-T.D. Jakes
imma let my "gift make room" for me. two snaps! i ain't gonna "pray away my opportunity."
Monday, February 11, 2008
for my md, dc, & va folks...
if you're registerd in any of these states/district, don't forget to do your research tonight (if you haven't already) and vote tomorrow.
smooches
smooches
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
no lie (i can't MAKE this stuff up)...
a woman at my job said (paraphrasing starts here) "she's not a fan of hilary clinton because she's arrogant. she doesn't like obama because he's muslim. well, she likes him as a person but she doesn't think a muslim should be running the country given all the stuff that happened on 9/11. who knows... he could have been planted here by them years ago to run for president."
first off:
is obama muslim? or is it that his father was so, inherently, he is? like... "my dad's a jew and my mom's catholic so i'm both" typa thing? imma go google this 'cause now i wanna know.
for two:
who says that out loud?!!? and at work (for that matter)?!?! how does she know i'm not muslim or the person next to me or the person next to her? in the 5 years i've been here, never once have i claimed a religious affiliation. not once! y'all know my sentiments on religion and such so i tend to not have those discussions with folks. only thing i can figure is that she actually IS that ignorant and oblivious to say that without a second thought.
thirdly:
uh... did blatant racial/ethinc/culture/religious profiling come back in style and someone forgot to send me the memo? these days it's usually more covert, right? is it the 1960s again? you can't assume that every muslim on the planet is a terrorist.
sidebar: the more i write the more i just can't believe what i've witnessed.
this goes to show that you can't put anything past "folks." even the ones you think you know and are your friends. i've been to this woman's daughter's wedding... happy hours... strolls to the cafeteria. we even text each other when we're not at work on ocassion to make sure one another is okay or to warn one another about traffic detours in the morning.
how many other people in my daily life think this way? what's to stop them from not wanting me as a coworker or boss because i'm black, or female, or gay? i'm so mad and so sad at the same time.
it's like the time when another co-worker commented that "the gay problem in rehoboth beach really isn't that bad anymore. they just come right up to you and start talking like anyone else would." as if "the gays" (shout out to hashi tashi) are part of a zoo exhibit and they should bark like orangutan-princess in coming to america! wtf?
first off:
is obama muslim? or is it that his father was so, inherently, he is? like... "my dad's a jew and my mom's catholic so i'm both" typa thing? imma go google this 'cause now i wanna know.
for two:
who says that out loud?!!? and at work (for that matter)?!?! how does she know i'm not muslim or the person next to me or the person next to her? in the 5 years i've been here, never once have i claimed a religious affiliation. not once! y'all know my sentiments on religion and such so i tend to not have those discussions with folks. only thing i can figure is that she actually IS that ignorant and oblivious to say that without a second thought.
thirdly:
uh... did blatant racial/ethinc/culture/religious profiling come back in style and someone forgot to send me the memo? these days it's usually more covert, right? is it the 1960s again? you can't assume that every muslim on the planet is a terrorist.
sidebar: the more i write the more i just can't believe what i've witnessed.
this goes to show that you can't put anything past "folks." even the ones you think you know and are your friends. i've been to this woman's daughter's wedding... happy hours... strolls to the cafeteria. we even text each other when we're not at work on ocassion to make sure one another is okay or to warn one another about traffic detours in the morning.
how many other people in my daily life think this way? what's to stop them from not wanting me as a coworker or boss because i'm black, or female, or gay? i'm so mad and so sad at the same time.
it's like the time when another co-worker commented that "the gay problem in rehoboth beach really isn't that bad anymore. they just come right up to you and start talking like anyone else would." as if "the gays" (shout out to hashi tashi) are part of a zoo exhibit and they should bark like orangutan-princess in coming to america! wtf?
Thursday, December 06, 2007
word
shout out to the bamma that stole my catalytic converter. may you have a wonderful holiday and a more blessed new year.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
another perspective on the "black family" and interracial families

being a part of an interracial family, i'm always intrigued by how others are affected by their mergings of life, culture, and the like. a (black) friend of mine from high school is featured in the Aug issue of Latina Magazine along with his new, brilliantly gorgeous (in and out) family. check out the article. his name is marrice... her name, yahaira (pronounced ja-HAD-da.. you know...with the spanish tongue roll thingy).
interesting read...
aren't they just stunning??


interesting read...
aren't they just stunning??


Monday, June 25, 2007
5 minute management course
(another one from gramps...)
Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob,the next-door neighbor.Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that Towel."After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?""It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies."Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to Credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2:
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, Forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129 It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you Might miss a great opportunity.
Lesson 3:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish.""Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."Puff! She's gone."Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life."Puff! He's gone."OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.
Lesson 4:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"The eagle answered: "Sure , why not."So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy.""Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.They're packed with nutrients."The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story:
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.Lesson 6A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
THIS ENDS THE 5-MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE
Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob,the next-door neighbor.Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that Towel."After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?""It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies."Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to Credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2:
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, Forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129 It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you Might miss a great opportunity.
Lesson 3:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish.""Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."Puff! She's gone."Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life."Puff! He's gone."OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.
Lesson 4:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"The eagle answered: "Sure , why not."So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy.""Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.They're packed with nutrients."The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story:
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.Lesson 6A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
THIS ENDS THE 5-MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
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